There is... Something!

Yes, I do understand. There is definitely something that attracts me to this one man... perhaps an extraordinary force that engages me in this plethora of emotions or just the plain nothingness about this bond we share. No questions asked, no promises made... fingers entangled, but no hearts entwined. Pleasures shared, but no commitments sought. Yet there's something, something that I just can not lay my finger upon. And yet I want to hold it. And as I try, it slips out of my hand like sand from an hourglass. Little by little. But an hourglass fills at the opposite end, my heart does not. It empties. And this something... makes me yearn for the comfort that his arms around my neck bring and it makes me want to touch the small of his back. And to lie with him under the duvet, tracing the contours of his face. And it leaves me thinking, why him of all the people that I have met and chased through this walk of life? Why him, when he can not even promise me togetherness for tomorrow, let alone a lifetime.